Before I Let You Go
by oyasumiQuincy
Summary: Sequel to Only Reminds Me of You...I love you...goodbye.


Disclaimer: I do wish I own PoT…

Warning!!...before you read this, please read Wedding Bells first…and then Only reminds me of you…this is already the third installment so you wouldn't quite understand what is going on here if you didn't read the first two…though I'm not so sure about that…:D

A/N: Well, thanks to shiro-hizu and allalabeth for this idea. They suggested that I make a sequel fic re: Tezuka's reaction on Fuji's death…and tadaa!! Here it is…:D

* * *

_I love you…always remember that…_

Tezuka Kunimitsu was standing in front of a familiar grave, two years after his life started to change. "Syuusuke…" he whispered.

_I can still remember yesterday_

_We were so in love in a special way_

_And knowing that you love me_

_Made me feel oh so right_

It has been two years since Fuji broke up with him. He remembered the tensai's words before he left his residence, without looking back. "_I'll take you back…_" That was what Syuusuke promised him. But he never fulfilled his promise until one day…

_But now I feel lost, don't know what to do_

_Each and everyday I think of you_

_Holdin' back the tears, I'm trying with all my might_

O Flash back O

"Miko-neesan…" He wondered what was wrong. It was unusual for Miko-neesan to call him, especially since he was currently in Melbourne, competing in the Australian Open.

Fuji Yumiko, or as he fondly called her, Miko-neesan, was Syuusuke's older sister. She was the reason why he still received news about Syuusuke, even though the tensai would refuse to talk to him or see him. She was the one that wanted the two back together, even if he was married. Usually, it was him who called first, asking about Syuusuke, but now, it was Miko-neesan. Something was definitely wrong.

"Mitsu-san, it's about Syuusuke." Miko-neesan's voice was croaky, as if she had been crying uncontrollably. Tezuka's brows cringed, he felt nervous but he said nothing about it to the lady. "What is it?" He asked instead.

"Syuusuke…" Miko-neesan started. She couldn't find the right words. "Syuusuke…is," her voice trailed, and was replaced by sobbing and sniffing. When Tezuka was about to ask why, he heard a voice in the background, but it wasn't Syuusuke's.

"Nee-san, give me the phone, I'll tell him." It was Yuuta-kun. Tezuka thought of what Yuuta was going to tell him. Could it be that Syuusuke was going to get married? No, it couldn't be. Syuusuke once told Miko-neesan that he wouldn't do as Kunimitsu did. Apparently, the tensai refused to be with someone else after what happened between them. To Tezuka, it was good news, if only he wasn't forced to marry Todou Rinko.

Yes, Todou Rinko, Atobe Keigo's cousin. She was Japan's richest rising star and a top model. She was also an heir to the Todou Group, one of Japan's largest companies. At first, Tezuka wanted to call the marriage off, but Syuuske's words prevented him from doing so. "_Do as they say…_" Syuusuke said.

"Tezuka-san, Yuuta here." The boy talked to him coolly, as if there wasn't anyone crying beside him. But Tezuka noticed a slight changed in the boy's voice. "About aniki, he's…dead."

As if buckets of icy water were poured on him, Tezuka stood frozen, unable to comprehend what Yuuta just said. Syuusuke…can't be…dead, right? Tezuka clenched his fists and closed his eyes, and thinking that he was just dreaming, asked the Yuuta. "Excuse me, I think I heard you wrong. Syuusuke, is dead?" He prayed that he was just hearing things, but unfortunately, an audible sigh was heard from the other end. "I'm sorry, Tezuka-san."

_Because you've gone and left me standing all alone_

_And I know I've got to face tomorrow on my own_

_But baby…_

O Flash back O

Tezuka kneeled in front of the grave and arranged the flowers, a silent tear flowing down his cheek. As he sat down, Tezuka removed his glasses and wiped it with his shirt. _Tch, dust got in my eye again_, he thought. After wiping the non-existent dirt from his glasses, he looked at it and sighed. If Fuji heard what he just thought of, the tensai would probably smirk at him. He was pretty lame when it came to excuses. He never made excuses for he believed that men should be responsible for their actions. He never learned to make excuses or exemptions, not until Fuji came to him.

_Before I let you go_

_I want to say I love you_

_I hope that you're listening 'coz it's true, baby_

_You'll be forever in my heart_

_And I know that no one else will do_

_Yeah, so before I let you go_

_I want to say it…_

_I love you._

To him, Fuji was an angel from heaven. He was his redemption from the "usual"; his rest from the rules. Fuji released him from the things that used to restrain him. Fuji was his savior, his freedom, his life. But he let Fuji down. He made the greatest mistake of his life, and that was when he let Fuji leave the Tezuka residence a few years back. If only he had come after the tensai's retreating back. If only he didn't listen to Fuji when to the tensai told him to stay away from him. _If only…_, Tezuka sighed.

_I wish that it could be just like before_

_I know I could've given you so much more_

_Even though you know I'd given you all my love_

Tezuka was having too many regrets. He knew Fuji wouldn't like it, but he can't help himself. He was pining for Fuji, he wanted to follow Fuji, but he knew that the tensai would not accept it. A soft wind blew as Tezuka adjusted his overcoat. It was almost winter season in Japan. He looked around and saw some all-too-familiar scenes unveiling before his eyes. He remembered winter back from his Seigaku days. Winters spent before a cozy fire, bonding with his teammates, holding hands with the person he loved the most. When he looked at his gloved hand, it's as if the memory was still fresh, for he could feel the warmth of Fuji's hand. Tezuka closed his palms, and brought it close to his heart.

_I miss your smile, I miss your kiss_

_Each and everyday I reminisce_

'_Coz baby it's you that I'm always dreaming of…_

Tezuka remembered how he tried to talk to Fuji the day after the tensai left him. He tried every means he knew to win the tensai back, even if it meant showering the tensai with gifts and phone calls. The regulars from the tennis club even went as far as conspiring with other schools' tennis club in Tokyo just to help him. He remembered when Atobe Keigo and other Hyotei regulars "ambushed" and "kidnapped" Fuji and made Tezuka look like his savior to make the tensai realize his love for the then captain of the Seigaku tennis club. Yes, it was effective, because Fuji admitted that he never really denied his love for Tezuka. But he also admitted that he can never love Tezuka the way that the buchou wanted it. Of course Atobe didn't understand it, being the person that he is. But Tezuka did, and he felt dejected, as if the whole world was on his back.

_Because you've gone and left me standing all alone_

_And I know I've got to face tomorrow on my own_

_But baby…_

For days after that incident, Tezuka stopped any means of contact with the tensai. He was hurt beyond repair. During practices, he tried to make sure that he would not have a match with the tensai, but be able to watch his matches, or that Fuji would be nowhere in his field of vision, but somewhere in his perimeter. But he didn't feel happy; he never enjoyed that time in his life. Whenever the tensai was late or not around, he would always look for him, even if it means leaving the team for a while. And when he saw that Fuji was alright, he would feel relieved and go back to his post, afraid that the tensai might spot him and cause him more damage.

_Before I let you go_

_I want to say I love you_

_I hope that you're listening 'coz it's true, baby_

_You'll be forever in my heart_

_And I know that no one else will do_

_Yeah, so before I let you go_

_I want to say it…_

Tezuka lighted a candle. It was almost sun down. A few days ago, when returned to Japan from the French Open, he was welcomed by Miko-neesan and Yuuta. They drove him around the city and treated him out for dinner. They talked about things about the past that they kept in their hearts, and that included Fuji Syuusuke.

O Flash back O

"Mitsu-kun, how are you doing now?" Fuji Yumiko looked at Tezuka as she sipped from her cup of coffee. They were dining in one of Tokyo's famous restaurants, overseeing the Tokyo tower. It was beautiful at night, just like Fuji's eyes.

"I'm fine, a little tired, but fine, nee-san. Since I just came home, I have lots of things to do. I have been gone for a few months, and now that I'm back in Japan, I have lots of things to finish. Press conferences, coaching and managing the business…and to top it off, I have to train for the Wimbledon Men's Tennis for next year," Tezuka answered as he looked at the Fuji siblings. Usually, around the two, he could always show himself, as if he was with Syuusuke. They treated him as part of the family, for they knew that Tezuka is the only guy that Fuji ever loved, and because of that, they were ready to take care of Tezuka as Fuji's significant other. But tonight, the siblings were unusually quiet. Miko-neesan was looking out the window while Yuuta was in deep thought while staring at his food. "Is there something bothering you, Yuuta-kun?"

Yuuta looked startled, and blinked at Tezuka before answering. "Oh, it's nothing really. It's just that…," he said with a pained smiled. "It's just that, it's aniki's death anniversary next week, and I was hoping that you could visit him. But when you said that you were busy, I guess that it won't be possible now," Yuuta added quickly.

Silence fell on the table upon hearing what Yuuta said. True, in a few days' time, the Fuji siblings, together with Saeki and some other close friends, will commemorate Fuji's death anniversary. It has been almost two years, but everything seemed like yesterday.

"Syuusuke…" Tezuka whispered to himself. Yumiko heard this, and audibly sighed. When she knew that she had caught Tezuka's attention, she said, "I think it's healthier for you if you just move on from Fuji. Why don't you try locking him into your memories, Kunimitsu?"

Tezuka pondered on Yumiko's question. He knew that he could never forget about Fuji. But why so? _Why,_ he asked himself.

O Flash back O

_Letting love go is never easy_

_But I love you so that's why I set you free_

_And I know_

_Someday_

_Somehow_

_I'll find a way to leave it all behind me_

_Guess it wasn't meant to be_

_But baby…_

Tezuka removed the leaf that flew on top of Fuji's grave. _Syuuske, _he said. Tezuka stood up, and felt something in his pocket. He reached for it and wiped it clean. He looked at it, kissed it and knelt down again. He reached for his bag and pulled another thing from it, kissed it and put it on top of the grave. _These are for you_, he said. A tear went down his cheek again, but again, he didn't bother to wipe it. This time, he wouldn't deny shedding a tear or two for Fuji.

_Before I let you go_

_I want to say I love you_

_I hope that you're listening 'coz it's true, baby_

_You'll be forever in my heart_

_And I know that no one else will do_

_Yeah, so before I let you go_

_I want to say it…_

"I love you…" Tezuka said. And with that, he turned toward his car, leaving his beloved's grave, together with his championship medal and a framed copy of his divorce paper. What Yumiko-neesan said about him forgetting Fuji was healthier. But, Tezuka knew, that that is the one thing that he could never do, not even until his last breath.

O Owari O

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Thanks to Freestyle for the song entitled "Before I Let You Go"…it's a really nice song, mind you…the tune is so sentimental…it would break your heart if you try to feel it (the song)…hihi…:P 

There!!...with this fic…I put an end to the trilogy that I started not so long ago…:D and to all those who supported Wedding Bells, Only Reminds me of You and this fic…ARIGATO!!!:D

please review…and my sincerest apologies for the mistakes in writing…n.n" arigato…:D


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